SVG
Commentary
Philos Project

From Israel, with Love

Adjunct Fellow, Center for Religious Freedom

Just days after my family鈥檚 Christmas and New Years celebrations ended in California, and before I returned to Israel, I stopped at a drugstore to pick up a couple of travel-size products.

As I searched for Aisle 8, where small bottles of shampoo, hairspray, shower gel and other TSA-approved carry-on items are displayed, I noticed some rather urgent activity going on in Aisle 3, the greeting card section.

Christmas, New Year and Hanukkah cards were hurriedly being yanked off the racks, tossed into bins and carefully replaced by valentines of every shape, style and message. Meanwhile, on the other side of the aisle was a vast array of chocolates in heart-shaped boxes.

It was only the first week of January. But America鈥檚 Valentine鈥檚 Day merchandising machine was already in full swing.

As I stood in the checkout line, my mind wandered to Israel. I tried my best to recall what Valentine鈥檚 Day looks like there, but I simply couldn鈥檛 remember. And then it dawned on me that there was an explanation for that: If you want to celebrate Valentine鈥檚 Day in Jerusalem, you have to go looking for it.

There are a couple of reasons for this valentine void. For one thing, Hallmark holidays haven鈥檛 yet hijacked the Israeli market 鈥� not Mother鈥檚 Day, Father鈥檚 Day or birthdays. Not even Valentine鈥檚 Day.

For another, Valentine鈥檚 Day is a theoretically a Christian holiday 鈥� ostensibly celebrating the life and martyrdom of a soldier named Valentine who was reportedly executed by Claudius Caesar for a heroic act. The story is sketchy, to say the least. There seem to have been several heroes with the same name.

Meanwhile, even in America, it鈥檚 tricky to try to explain how a courageous saint鈥檚 burial date has become an occasion for roses-are-red rhymes (sometimes risqu茅 ones at that), pre-wrapped jewelry items studded with red rhinestones, and bouquets of red roses tied, of course, with red ribbons. Not to mention a zillion cards addressed to friends, classmates, family members and sweethearts.

And as for Israel? Granted, the lingerie shop window on Emek Refaim Street in Jerusalem currently features a few dozen red paper hearts serving as a backdrop for a slinky red nightgown and some other lacy items. But I looked in vain elsewhere, on both sides of the busy street 鈥� which boasts at least 10 gift shops 鈥� for any other signs of Valentine鈥檚 Day.

Interestingly, one possible explanation is that there is a Jewish holiday that bears some resemblance to Valentine鈥檚 Day. It鈥檚 called and it takes place in the summertime.

Tu B鈥橝v, the 15th Day of Av, is both an ancient and modern holiday. Originally a post-biblical day of joy, it served as a matchmaking day for unmarried women in the period (before the fall of Jerusalem in 70 C.E.). Tu B鈥橝v was almost unnoticed in the for many centuries, but it has been rejuvenated in recent decades, especially in the modern state of Israel. In its modern incarnation it is gradually becoming a Hebrew-Jewish , slightly resembling in English-speaking countries.

In any case, young Jerusalem lovers really don鈥檛 need a holiday to revel in their passion. As in the west, they are free to flirt, walk hand-in-hand, embrace and kiss (except in very religious communities) every day of the year. The radio plays love songs 24/7, amorous films are everywhere and wedding celebrations never cease. Love is always in the air.

But there鈥檚 another kind of love in Israel that seems rather exceptional to me, and uniquely Israeli. It鈥檚 not a hearts-and-flowers expression, but rather a kind of communal, brotherly love that I鈥檝e rarely witnessed elsewhere

For example, a story recently appeared in the Israeli news site that caught my eye.

Dozens of Israelis answered a Facebook appeal to help a 90-year-old woman living alone in poor conditions in the northern part of the country. Photos documented her squalid surroundings. The following are samples of responses from complete strangers:

鈥淲illing to give her a brand-new feather quilt, warm slippers and clothing. And where can I bring bedding and a winter coat?鈥�

鈥淚 can organize food 鈥� easily, since I live in her area 鈥� and sheets and I can donate a table, and because I have a car, anyone can contact me to deliver things to her.鈥�

鈥淚nterested in buying her a new heater, and if she needs any other electrical appliance, I鈥檇 be happy to buy that, too. Is there a cell phone number I can call?鈥�

鈥淪end me a cell number, and I鈥檒l take care of doing her shopping and bring her blankets or whatever else she needs.鈥�

鈥淚 have a new heater to give her and a used stove, if she needs it. I can deliver the heater today.鈥�

鈥淚s there a bank account where one can transfer money to her?鈥�

鈥淲hen can I get to work?鈥�

鈥淗ey, I鈥檇 love to know how I can donate supplies and to come and help renovate her house.鈥�

As one writer pointed out, 鈥淭his is the beautiful side of Israeli society, which so often gets overlooked in the fray of politics and conflict.鈥�

, a 鈥渟ocial experiment鈥� 鈥� a kind of 鈥渄o you love your neighbor?鈥� exercise 鈥� resembled episodes on the old Candid Camera TV show. A man pretending to be blind was videotaped asking passersby to give him change for a 20-shekel note. Except what he was holding in his hand was a 100-shekel note.

According to the video, 鈥淓very single person he stopped on the street 鈥� including some who approached to ask if he needed help 鈥� pointed out that the bill he was holding was, in fact, a 100-shekel bill. One man even gave him an additional 20 shekels. Other passersby behaved in exactly the same way when the same experiment was conducted with a 200-shekel bill.鈥�

I was sorry to read that when a similar experiment was performed in the U.S., 鈥渕any Americans took advantage of the situation.鈥�

For me, an especially poignant Israeli-style 鈥渧alentine鈥� took place a few weeks ago. A young man who works in real estate and is about the age of my 30-something sons was in touch with me by phone about a referral I鈥檇 given him.

In passing, I asked him if he knew where I could purchase a new printer for my computer and have it delivered to my home. He called me back with a couple of websites, but both were in Hebrew, and apart from the HP logo and the prices, I couldn鈥檛 figure out what was being offered.

We talked again, and he looked at the sites and provided me with prices, features and phones numbers. I tried phoning a nearby store, but reached a robotic phone tree; not only was it in Hebrew, it also kept disconnecting my call. I decided to go to the store in a taxi, but there was a downpour so I thought I鈥檇 better wait.

When the young man called me back to check yet again, I told him what I鈥檇 decided to do.

鈥淣o, don鈥檛 do that,鈥� he said, and then paused momentarily. 鈥淟ook, I鈥檓 going to go buy the printer and bring it to you right now.鈥�

鈥淣o! You don鈥檛 need to do that 鈥� I can do it!鈥�

鈥淣o, I insist. It no big deal.鈥�

鈥淏耻迟鈥︹赌�

鈥淚鈥檒l be there in an hour.鈥�

He appeared at my door (third floor, no elevator) an hour later, dripping with rainwater and carrying the printer. He had paid for it himself (of course I paid him back), installed it, called technical support to solve an ink cartridge issue 鈥� which took an hour 鈥� and didn鈥檛 leave until the job was done.

It鈥檚 true that there are many kinds of love, and the romantic version that inspires poems of the 鈥渞oses are red, violets are blue鈥� variety is a wonderful, exhilarating experience.

But the kind of love I鈥檝e so often seen demonstrated in this war-torn nation is spontaneous, generous and guileless. I鈥檓 pretty sure it鈥檚 rooted in an eternal principle that believing Christians and Jews share. And it dates back to something very close to the Year One.

鈥淟ove your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord鈥� (Lev 19:18).

Greeting cards, red hearts, boxes of chocolates and bouquets of roses are optional.